Letting Go

Perhaps one of the hardest lessons I’ve learned (and am constantly re-learning) is how to let go. Of the past, the present, the future. Grudges. Goals that for one reason or another have no way of coming to fruition. Plans that I’d like to set in motion but have to put on hold for “the opportune moment”… Anything really. I still haven’t figured out the “process” of letting go. I only know that one day, I’ll wake up and find that I don’t want to hold on to certain things anymore, and then I actively go about re-programming my brain to not automatically leap to the worst possible conclusion. Or not to automatically drudge up old woulds to re-salt. It’s a task that takes constant effort, but I find it’s getting easier.Or, at the very least, I’m recognizing ways to make it easier.

What does this have to do with writing?

I haven’t done any. For awhile.  I can sit here and rationalize perfectly good reasons why I haven’t, but that would be a waste of everyone’s time. Including my own. The truth is, I’ve been holding on to past resentment and toxic ways of thinking. I’ve also been trying to write a story that I’ve broken too many times to think straight about anymore. All novice writers are told not to give up on their first project. To stick with it, to prove to yourself that you can finish something. So, for a really long time, I stuck with Dirge, constantly fighting back the suspicion that it wasn’t going to work. There are a lot of problems with the plot and honestly…I’ve tried to “fix” it so many times that I think I made the problems worse instead of better, and try as I might, I’m just not equipped to fix them just yet.

So I’m “shelfing” Dirge for the time being, and moving on to a project that I’m excited and most importantly, passionate about, and looking forward to sharing concepts (including artwork!) soon.

Speaking of artwork, you can see two of my pieces featured on Joely Sue Burkhart’s website here, and promotional cards for her latest release Golden. For details on obtaining the cards, you can contact the lovely Ms. Burkhart or myself, or leave a comment expressing interest and I will contact you.

For any authors looking for an artist to do promotional images featuring your characters? I will have price listings and sample work up within the next few weeks. Stay Tuned!

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About S.J. Collins

Dolphin trainer by daylight, writer by moonlight Born and raised in the Bahamas, S.J. Collins writes gray-shaded characters seeking revenge, resolution, and redemption. Because she knows sometimes you have to smolder before you can rise. If you don’t mind a little blood, sweat, and tears on the carpet, you’re welcome to come along for the ride. But keep your fingers to yourself, most of her characters bite. When not training dolphins (more like getting trained by them) to pay the bills, or writing to fill the void, SJ can be found doodling on any scrap of paper she can get her hands on, trying to harness the alchemy that is cooking (and considers any result above not burning the house down a great success), staying way up past her bed time to read, or fangirling over her obsessions (of which there are far to many too name) on tumblr. View all posts by S.J. Collins

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